When the great web historians dust off the ancient tome that is our webcomic, Clark’s post will truly be praised as being “lulz-worthy.” 

 Louisiana Limey 4 Lyfe,

Caldy 

It’s been 2 years, 2 days since the founding of QLC. What have Caldwell and I learned? Multiple Choice time:

a. If you don’t advertise, after 2 years your webcomic will only have 4 fans (three of which you know in real life, and the other -who you suspect is either one of those same three, or your mom- will go by the handle “Pinkerton”)
b. Just how much you can pun before puns are no fun for anyone.
c. Nothing.
d. Everything.

The correct answer is a, b, and (c+d)/2.

Happy 2nd Anniversary. Especially you, Pinkerton.

A big thanks to Caldwell for thinkin’ and a drawin’ this here strip up, all by hisself! I’ve been super crazy awesome busy, so Scaldwell has picked up my slack this week.  We’ll be posting one more comic this year, and yes, it will have ANOTHER Captain Falcon reference. We’re desperately trying to win the award for Most Captain Falcon Appearances in ANY MEDIUM EVER. We just might have Scott Ramsoonair beat.

I know that we promised to keep as far from political comics as possible, but unfortunately we care more about a good pop culture reference than bipartisanship. Trust me, we’d be mocking anyone who could have won (if they had)*.

Enjoy the strip.

*Except Ron Paul. RAWN PAWL /b/!!!

I hope you like the comic, and moreso the last panel. I like it so much I made wallpapers. Get ‘em while they’re awesome.

Big 

Medium

Small   

 seeya soon! 

~Caldwell 

I’ll probably write more tomorrow. Right now it’s 3:45 am, so forgive my brevity.

This is an amazing comic. Many props to Caldwell for once again bringing this idea to life in a way that I can’t even imagine. If this was an eBay transaction, he’d get: “A++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ WOULD RECOMEND STRONGLEY!!!!1 GREAT SELLAR!!!!!!!!!!!”

That last panel is epic.

Seriously.

Caldwell nearly finished the comic on time, but his computer died. I totally believe him. That has never happened before.

In the meantime, enjoy these doodles that Caldwell has been inserting into random library books. It’s like a message in a bottle.

Alright, back to work. Those imagedumps on /b/ won’t download themselves.

The humor from this strip comes from it’s proximity to the truth.

Really.

We have normal, non-self-deprecating comics in the pipe. Stay tuned.

Barack Obama would be a great character in Soul Eater, though I don’t know if he’d be better as a weapon or meister.

You wouldn’t know it from the dearth of updates from us, but Caldwell and I have a lot in the pipeline that’ll be coming soon. We just finished our two page contribution to the Clatch’s collection, and have a backlog of good scripts to illustrate (they’re not all just puns, I promise). Caldwell is also continuing work on the flash animation, which I hope we can get out before the end of the year.

We haven’t abandoned you, dear reader. Not yet.

Yeah, I’ve done this. Not often, mind you, but I do watch TV, movies, and the occasional foreign cartoon while relaxing in a hot bath.

I would say “don’t knock it ’til you try it,” but I know that no one who reads this will be so nonjudgmental. I will be living with my parents for the next two months, so unfortunately I almost perfectly fit the complete loser pseudo-otaku stereotype. It’s horribly embarrassing, yet I wrote this strip which will undoubtedly haunt me forever. Damn you, Caldwell, stop drawing my bad ideas.

Good lord.

It has been forever since we last updated. I nearly forgot how.

Caldwell and I are rocking out a sweet two page spread for a comic collection coming out later. Also, he’s working on a super secret flash animation that I scripted long ago. It will be STELLAR. As for me, I’m busy at work, psychologizing the day away at 10-12 hour intervals, followed by 2-3 hour work sessions in my basement creating spudguns and various airsoft gadgets. It’s a long day, and I’m pretty backlogged (as is Caldwell). Updates here will likely be few until our big projects are done, but we promise to have something out every fortnight, even if it’s just a one panel Jokes McGee throwaway.

Alright, it’s back to the basement. Wish me luck.

  It’s been a dog’s age friends, an absolute DOG’s AGE.

So here’s how it goes. Clark and I recently decided to submit a story to a soon to-be-published anthology of work by a group of north carolina webcartoonists. You can find out more about them here. I’ll be talking more about that in the coming weeks.

I hope you enjoy the “director’s cut” of this comic, much better than the 1500 pixel tall monstrosity Clark was touting earlier. Also, if you’re ever bored of all the not-posting I’m doing here, feel free to swing by my blog, where I post videos, and other non-QLC drawings I do. There are links there to my tumblr and twitter as well, you know…if you’re into that.

web2.yes,

Caldy

This week’s comic, Gurren LOG ON, or, Why Kamina is Banned from Internet Cafes, is the first in a series of one panel strips we’ll be doing while preparing our bit for a webcomic collaboration book; I’ll let Caldwell fill you in on the details surrounding that project. Posting times will be erratic as well (though you, dear reader, must be quite familiar with that by now). Don’t fret, though, for we still have at least one multipanel strip coming out in the coming weeks.

By the way, did you know that the Sci Fi channel has been showing the dubbed Gurren Lagann? It’s too bad that Adult Swim didn’t get it; I hate their choice, Code Geass, with immeasurable disdain.

Also, in recent news, Nashville, Tennessee, my HomeTown (c) and current place of residence, has been trolled. Unfortunately, I’m not exaggerating: the ENTIRE city has been trolled. Someone started a rumor that gas was running out in the wake of Hurricane Ike, and the rush to buy what gas was left actually depleted the entire city’s supply. Over 85% of the gas stations in Davidson county have no gas. Thanks a bunch, you panicking idiots. I have a quarter tank of gas and no confidence that I’ll be able to fill up within a few days, so I’m only driving for absolute necessity. Combined with the recent finding/suspicion that the Palin email “hacker” was a Tennessean, I’m beginning to suspise that a #chan had its hand in this… it would be just too lulzy to any outsider to not be.

Also in epic trolling news: Oprah

Seriously, there’s something wrong with Captain Crunch; according to our understanding of the physical world, it shouldn’t be allowed to taste that good.

Thankfully, scientists in Europe are working to understand this ethereal cereal mystery, though fringe groups believe that their efforts wil cause the world to be destroyed in a maelstrom of crunchberries. It’s a small price to pay for scientific advancement, methinks.

I really liked how Caldwell illustrated this strip, especially the final frame, which is one of the scariest illustrations I’ve ever seen. It really surprised me when he sent me the sketch; of course we talk about what we’d like the characters to look like beforehand, but it’s really up to Caldwell to bring a script to life and give it feeling beyond words, and this one is a winner in my book.

Though it pains me to tell him, Caldwell inadvertantly stumbled into meme territory with the scary-ass final panel, as Carter’s expression is a dead-on perfect example of the DO IT FAGGOT meme, just begging to be macro-ed. Considering how much he dislikes anon/#chan anything, Caldwell will be disgusted to learn that he has accidentally provided ammunition for the /b/oards.

I don’t think I’m going to tell him, though.  I’ll wait for him to read this first.

Hiya folks. I’m going to stop apologizing for our lateness, as the “I’m sorry” bit loses its sincerity pretty quickly after about the 25th repetition. Oh well… We’ll try to do better from now on, but we can’t make you any promises. We’re like your alcoholic parents, promising you the world but getting piss drunk right before your piano recital and completely forgetting about you until the next day. Also, we drank your Christmas present money away. Sorry abou- I mean, too bad.

We have been sorta productive though. We made this video, you see. We tried to do something in a Tim and Eric style, parodying the self-help instruction videos (this time on Computer Instruction for Seniors). In typical T&E anticomedy fashion, I tried to edit it as closely to an actual instructional video format (especially the thirty second intro) and then I had to carefully deconstruct it to make it look terrible. That deconstruction was actually a lot harder than the first part, and seeing as this is our first video, it was a painful process. The beat-boxing at the end was done really quickly, too, and it could stand a full 30 seconds length if I did a better job at it. It was a good learning experience, at least.

Aww geez, it’s over? Well, it was a good run while it lasted. I think we’ll not start any new arcs for a while, and stick to the one-shot strips for simplicity’s sake.

I’m not writing much today because I’m exhausted from shooting and editing footage until late in the night / early in the morning. I can’t yet tell you what the project is, but know that it’ll be on the tubes within a week and is guaranteed funny (or not). If you like Tim and Eric style comedy, you should like it.

That is all.

So… anyone miss us while we were gone? Sorry to leave you so abruptly, but Caldwell disappeared on a journey into some mysterious abyss and only recently returned. He’ll tell you all about it, I’m sure.

One more comic left in this arc! It sure took us long enough to get here; we’ll try not to disappoint you with a weak ending.

On an unrelated note, last night I stopped at McDonalds to get some caffeine and discovered the perfect corporate analogy:

McDonalds is the Wal*Mart of Starbucks.

I’m not sure if it’s a good or bad thing that those three corporations’ identities are distinguished enough to allow me to make that comparison. Either way, that coffee is sweet damn delicious. You can get a giant iced latte for $2.50, and it doesn’t half suck. Even though I prefer plain black coffee, it’s still pretty good. I never thought I’d actually find something at McDonalds for which I’d willingly pay… perhaps I misjudged you, Ronald.

Hey guys! It’s Caldwell, letting you know that a comic is coming. Jupiter himself conspired against Clark and myself, stealing electricity from Clark’s house and in turn, stealing Clark’s ability to send a script to me. If you’re checking the site right now, hoping to have secrets revealed and new truths uncovered, hold fast! A comic is coming. In the meantime, feel free to check out my blog, or view some of the crappy video clips I’ve been making on my vimeo page. Also, you can view all my recent college humor articles here.

that’s all I’ve got! comic coming soon.

30 comics! We did it!

By “we” I mean Caldwell, and by “did it” I mean “Caldwell did it.” All taken together, that means Caldwell Caldwell did it. That would be redundant to anyone who hasn’t seen how much work he puts into the strips; repeating his name twice is the least of the glory he deserves.

In current news, I’m still upset with “the man” for having constrained the 4th of July to a mere 24-hour period of government sanctioned explosions and mayhem. Considering that Christmas has 12 days of official celebration (though only one hour of one morning really matters), is it too unreasonable to extend the firework season to a fortnight, or at least a week? The economy would prosper; firework makers would make money, hospitals would make money, beer vendors would make money, etc. No one loses in this scenario, except a few tightfisted bosses who don’t want to give anyone more time off than they already get and perhaps the few hundred teenagers who blow their fingers off (which in turn gives the artificial limb industry more business! Everyone prospers!). We should be glad that those kids don’t have their fingers, anyways, because they’re the same kind of idiots who stumble through YouTube and 4chan posting “lol” or “wat” repeatedly. They’re a waste of electrons.

Write your elected representative. Lets make the next 4th last until at least the 14th!

I am making a post! Look at me go!

I have a lot to say, but it seems I’ve already said it! You can read all that and more at my new BLOG.

bookmarks good man! bookmarks!

~Caldwell

Hey, I’m in California. How about that? Even though Caldwell and I are on the opposite ends of the country, we still publish our comic on time. Booyah.

You know, I’d would’ve liked to make this series into a complete comic book; there’s a lot of story lost in the 4-panel weekly format that we could elaborate upon if given more room. Of course, that would take a super long time, and Caldwell just wouldn’t stand for it. Perhaps someday you’ll see a QLC #1 on the comic book racks, but don’t get your hopes up.

Speaking of getting one’s hopes up, the Supreme Court is quite likely going to hand down their ruling on Heller vs. DC, the second 2nd-Amendment case they’ve touched. Libertarians will rejoice (if all goes well). Yay.
In other news, “The Happening” still massively sucks.

—edit—
CNN is just now reporting that George Carlin has passed away.

Suddenly, comedy has lost a legendary figure as influential and provocative as Lenny Bruce, who was indeed a source of Carlin’s passion. Our hearts are with the family and friends of this epic contributor to the science of humor, lewdness, and indecency, who paved the way for novices such as ourselves on the QLC staff to be able to scribble obscenities and (potentially) offensive witticisms without reproach or fear of reprisal. He broadened the scope of criticism for the sake of humor, and will forever be known for his contributions to the art of perversity. He was a pioneer.

Alright, I’m off to listen to Bowie’s “Life on Mars?” a few dozen times. Perhaps that’ll level me out.

Trying to anthropomorphize vicious animals as cute and cuddly just doesn’t work well in the end. Who knows how many children have fallen victim to these seemingly harmless, multicolored predators?

Wake up, America. They’re not our friends.

Wow, we’re really packin’ the references in. I know that this only limits the number of people who could be part of our fanbase, but these three should be pretty easy to get; Bleach, Evangelion (times two, actually), and Death Note should be easier memes to spot than that striped-capped, cane-wielding pathological rapist (why else would everyone want to look for him?) in any Where’s Waldo book. On that note, having watched Caldwell’s lengthy process from idea to finished comic, I have to question the sanity of whoever illustrates Where’s Waldo. I haven’t seen one in quite a while, so he’s likely either involuntarily institutionalized for schizophrenia or just plain dead. I just don’t see how one could draw so many faces and not go completely insane; in my case, I know that I’d cut my hands off with a protractor to keep from having to draw any more.

Now, something completely different: The Happening. M Night Sham (it’s an appropriate abbreviation) teams up with Shooter McGavin Wahlbergh to make the shittiest movie since, well, The Lady in the Water. That doesn’t bode well for the Oscars. This movie sets a new standard for a complete failure to understand the basics of biology, as well as natural selection / evolution in general. If I could be one of the reviewers who put the blurbs on the DVD cover, I’d like mine to say,

“Please, give me brain damage. Hard.”
-Clark Shell, QLC

There’s only one way to remove this experience from my memory, and it involves a bottle of cheap vodka, a willing friend, a crowbar, and a band-aid or two. If that wasn’t blunt enough, let me make this perfectly clear.

DON’T SEE IT. THE BOREDOM WILL KILL YOU.

oh yeah, and before I forget… Happy Father’s Day!

Be sure to celebrate by heading over to Turner’s Dad Shack and picking up a brand-new, limited-warranty Dad! Turn in that old junky model for something more “with the times,” no down payment required! Time’s a wastin’, y’all, so head on down and get yourself a pep pep to be proud of! They don’t call me Honest Turner for a reason, so just do it, ok?

If you’re unsatisfied with the quality of the father you receive, call the 1-800 number stenciled into the father’s neck. Limited terms and conditions apply. Void if Quality Seal is broken. Do not feed after midnight.

   Did I already use that title? Whatever, it don’t matter.

I’d like to say more, but I’m at work. I’ll write again later tonight.

for now,

Caldwell

Clearly, we like having fun with words.

While Caldwell is busy waiting for his repaired wacom tablet to arrive, we’re doing comics without the graceful strokes of his digitally-transcribed pensmanship. Impressively enough, that means this comic was done using only the primitive mouse.

Kudos to Caldwell; he did this comic even better than I ever imagined.

Wow, yeah. We kinda disappeared on you, internet. No calls, no messages, just gone. We’re like a bad date.

We’re back for real this time, though. Really. We’ve nearly run out of excuses, so it’s time to buckle down and get this done.

Here’s the situation: Caldwell is interning for College Humor in NYC. Kind of a big deal. Also, his wacom tablet is broken. Kind of a big deal.

We’re dying to get this story line resolved; it’s all planned out, but the Gods are once again interfering with our affairs and blocking our attempts. As soon as Caldwell gets his tablet in order, we can resume the arc, but until then we’re just going to have to do without… expect snipplets MAX material for at least a week, and we can only guarantee Sunday updates until the situation is resolved. We’re worried that if we put too much up, it’ll distract from the established story that we’re trying to tell, but then again we’d lose all of our 3 loyal readers if we didn’t upload something from time to time.

Prepare for updates this Sunday. No kidding this time.

Well, its graduation time here, so we’ve been taking the past couple weeks off to deal with it. Starting next week, we’ll be back in motion with your regularly scheduled QLC events. We promise.

We hope some Captain Falcon can hold you over until then.

We at da beach.

I’ll be sure to get some drunk sketches posted for you guys upon my return.

pierce those heavens,

Caldwell

Yeah, I turned it in. That’s it. I’ve done everything I could do.

It’s a weird feeling to have my college career end. I honestly didn’t think it would.

But now, it’s all over. I did it. Like the first time I defeated Ganon in Zelda: A Link to the Past (best vidjergame ever made), I’m left feeling empty, not victorious. Sure, I did beat college; in fact, you could say I won it. Congrats. Whenever I played video games as a kid, I always felt uncomfortable after completing them, wondering to myself, “What do I do now?” I wasn’t sad or lonely, just unsure what to do with my button-mashing hands. That sort of unsettling feeling is creeping back, now that I’ve won the game degree. As I’ve said before, it’s a hard line to walk between emo and genuinely concerned for the future. I know that I’m part of the latter group, but there’s no question that I’m: 1) clueless, and 2) holding my future in my hands. That’s a REALLY bad combination.

Seriously, what do I do now?*

*inb4HighLife4Fridays

–edit–

Timestamp changed as to appear on mainpage. Srry felks!

One more paper left in my college career. Sigh.
Alright, back to the library…

Sorry for the shortness of this post. I’ll edit it later (tomorrow, most likely).

Right now I’m up to my ears in Japanese culture. It’s not as pleasant as it may sound.

Pool’s Snipplet’s Closed due to Exams.

Technically, we’re only obligated to update on Sundays, so this isn’t an actual violation of our duty to provide the internet with lulz.

We’ll have a Sunday strip, though, so don’t worry.

Thank goodness for Castle Doctrine! No one knows what kind of murderous intent would’ve been unleashed from the depths of Marty McFly’s soul had the complex scientific and philosophical concepts not found themselves reduced into an easily digested form. He could hide a chainsaw in the superfluous pockets of that down vest.

Well, things got a bit more complicated, as you can see. We’ve thrown a giant robot into the mix, as well as an apparently monstrous basement / industrial fabrication facility not commonly found in suburban apartment complexes. Where do these guys live, really? I personally suspise* that there’s a story to that probably involving murder. Unfortunately, we won’t ever bring it up ever again. Unless we’re bored and need a story.

Again, our apologies for not getting this comic up on time. Caldwell was busy as usual, and I was in Washington D.C., and thus I couldn’t physically compel him with corporeal punishment to hurry. A timely thrashing is a proper motivator.

-Clark

*I prefer that verb form instead of suspect, so it appears more similar to suspicious. I made it up, and I plan on using it in conversation. Eventually, it will become part of the English lexicon. You can help by using it, too.